Something for the weekend
The Newer nimbies
Ringer supposes it was inevitable that those opposed to the High Speed 2 project would be labelled as nimbies. So common is the term that it's even been publicly embraced by protestors, notably West Midlands MEP Nikki Sinclaire, who's adopted the 'Not In My Back Yard' moniker as a badge of pride.
But where's the fun in throwing insults at people pleased to be pilloried? So Ringer's indebted to Mark Barrow, Birmingham City Council’s hirsute strategic development director, for a new bit of name calling. "Nimbys have now been replaced by a new acronym Cavemen – communities against virtually everything," he says.
It's brilliant to find that £32bn is being invested in new forms of insult slinging and name calling. How about Folk Opposed to Overblown Locomotives Scheme (FOOLS) or People Really Against Train Strategy (PRATS)? Let the next decade of acronymic fun commence!
God’s grand design-ers
It's a given that, with the amount of telly time they now occupy, interior designers have an inflated view of their own importance (cue old joke about how many interior designers does it take to change a lightbulb? I’ll change that bulb and it'll change your life, dahhling!). However few could match the ambitions of Monteith Scott who are now altering the ambience of the abode of the Almighty.
The Birmingham-based home improvers have been given the job of redesigning the interior of The First Church of Christ, Scientist, in, Stratford-upon-Avon to make it a bit more, well, friendly. A little less "get behind me Satan" and more "come in for a cuppa, me old chum".
"The design will be fresh, colourful and contemporary," gushes managing director Alison Monteith, "which will help to create an inviting atmosphere for current members of the church as well as the general public."
Calling the Pot Black
Just as you thought that driving was becoming prohibitively expensive because of the cost of petrol, yet more bad news awaits, this time because of the Midlands' rotten roads.
A Wolverhampton second hand car dealer says potholes in the region's appalling asphalt means that two-thirds of motors brought to him are damaged.
"We’re talking about cars two or three years old, but which bear scars of much longer life," says Mark Jones, ACF Car Finance's divisional operations manager. "Paint chips, dented wheel rims, bulging tyre walls are now common, and there are many instances of damage to shock absorbers and suspension systems. Potholes can knock steering out of alignment and present a severe driving hazard which might only come to light in an emergency."
Which reminds us why we should take the train, but of course that takes us back to the HS2 row we started with. You can't win…
